The holiday season is packed full of celebrations, quality time with loved ones, and lasting memories! While this time of year brings lots of joy and excitement, the holidays can be exhausting for the entire family. The holidays end, the decorations come down, and suddenly you feel like you’re starting from scratch, rebuilding the routine you finally had in place. Kids are tired, caregivers are exhausted, and everyone is trying to get back on track.
After weeks of holiday breaks, special treats, late nights, and flexible schedules, it’s time to get back to “real life.” This shift can be overwhelming for all of us, and especially for children with autism who often thrive on predictability. Children are suddenly faced with a return of structure and expectations, as school, therapy, bedtime routines, and daily responsibilities resume almost overnight. Even familiar routines may feel challenging at first: kids might resist transitions, have more meltdowns, or struggle with skills they were demonstrating before the holidays. These are signs your child’s nervous system is working overtime trying to adapt. Gradual routines, clear expectations, and extra support can make getting back on track easier for everyone.
Resetting Routines
1. Start Small
You don’t need a perfect schedule right away. Start by picking one predictable part of the day and focus on rebuilding that first!
Good places to start include:
- Morning routines
- Mealtimes
- Bedtime
Once one part of the day feels more stable, you can gradually build from there without overwhelming you child, or yourself.
2. Visualize Expectations:
After a long break, children often need extra support understanding what comes next. Helpful tools include:
- Visual schedules
- Timers or countdowns
- Simple checklists
Even if your child didn’t need them before, temporary visual supports can reduce anxiety while routines are re-established.
3. Break Tasks into Smaller Steps:
After a break from routine, even familiar tasks can feel overwhelming. In ABA, we often break complex tasks (brushing teeth, cleaning up, getting ready, etc.) into smaller, more manageable steps to increase success and reduce frustration.
Example: Instead of “Brush your teeth”
- Get toothbrush and toothpaste
- Wet toothbrush
- Put toothpaste on toothbrush
- (And so on, until routine is complete)
You can support each step using modeling, gestures, pictures, or simple verbal cues. Praise efforts along the way after completion of each small step, even if your child needs help. As routines become more familiar again, steps can be combined and supports gradually faded.
4. Stay Flexible
January does not need to be perfect. It’s okay to temporarily lower expectations while routines are rebuilt and focus on progress rather than perfection.
Focus on:
- Progress, not perfection
- Small wins
- Acknowledging effort, not just outcomes
Being flexible doesn’t mean totally giving up on structure, but rather meeting your child where they are at and adjusting expectations to support success. It’s okay if routines don’t look exactly like they did before the holidays. Progress is not linear, and flexibility is part of success.
5. Take Care of Yourself Too
Parents often pour all their energy into helping their child reset, while ignoring their own exhaustion. Caregivers carry a lot, and this load often increases significantly during the holidays. By January, it’s common to feel exhausted, overwhelmed, or emotionally tapped out. If that’s you: you’re not alone, and you’re not doing anything wrong. Post-holiday caregiver burnout is real, normal, and absolutely worth talking about.
A few realistic ways to support yourself:
- Lower Expectations
- January does not need to be perfect. It’s okay to temporarily lower expectations for yourself and your family while you get back on track. Focus on progress over perfection and let the small wins count. Keep things simple (easy meals, routines, etc.) and focus on the essentials. It’s okay if life doesn’t look exactly like it did before the holidays. Progress is not linear, and flexibility is part of success.
- Prioritize Self-Care:
- Just 10–15 minutes a day for yourself can make a difference. Taking care of yourself isn’t selfish; it’s essential for your child’s success and the whole family’s well-being.
- Ask for Help:
- Reach out to your child’s care team, family, friends, or other caregivers for support. You’re not in this alone!
Final Thoughts
The post-holiday reset is not about getting back on track overnight. It’s about rebuilding routines in a way that feels supportive, realistic, and sustainable. Take one step at a time, celebrate each small win, and remember to care for yourself along the way. With patience and consistency, your family will be back in the groove before you know it!
Author: Jenna Underwood, RBT
